"Love means never having to say you're sorry" is a catchphrase based on a line from the Erich Segal’s novel Love Story and was popularized by its 1970 film adaptation starring Ali MacGraw and Ryan O'Neal.[1]
 
I respectfully beg to differ.
 
I believe that genuine love means that you may or have to say that you are sorry to another person, if, hurt or wrong, has been caused by you to the other, perceived or otherwise. In so doing, there is an acknowledgement and clarity on your part as to the import of the ‘thing’ that you have done, or, not done, and its affect and effect to love and loving union and communion with another. Saying sorry, in love, is all about nurturing and growing in love and loving.
 
Life is all about loving living.
 
Without love, even if I know all the languages of men and spiritual beings, I am just empty noise of resounding gongs and clanging cymbals. Even if I can foretell the future, understand and fathom all mysteries and knowledge, have the ability to perform the miraculous, yet, have not love, my life remains one of emptiness, without lasting value, purpose, meaning and significance.[2]
 
Love gives meaning, significance, purpose, substance and authenticity to and for our existence: for God is love. God chose us to belong to Christ before the world was created. He chose us to be holy and without blame in his eyes.[3] In love, He predestined and lovingly planned for us to be adopted as His own children through Jesus Christ, in accordance with the kind intention and good pleasure of His will.[4] Triune God freely gave us this Triune grace because of and through the Only Begotten Son, Who is loved[5], and is love.
 
I perceive that:
1. Creation essentially and fundamentally came into being out of love for Eternal Son to become a human being, not that Eternal Son had to become human because one human sinned or all humans have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
 
2. Whether or not humanity sinned, the desire and will of Triune God[6], conceived in eternity, was for Eternal Son to become a human, a created being, made in the image of God. All things were created through Son and for Son. This was Father’s will, pleasure and desire in eternity.[7] Therefore, Paul could say to the Athenians:
“In Him we live and move and have our being,”[8] so that we, as Peter wrote, may, “participate in the divine nature.”[9]
 
3. As such, Son is the only Way, Truth and Life whereby we can participate in and experience the Triune Divine Nature of love and loving.[10] Only in and through the Incarnate Son are we able to know God as Eternal Father, even as only the Father knows the Son and must reveal Him.[11]
 
Concerning this, I find the following words attributed to Jesus in his prayer, recorded in John 17, to be descriptively instructive:
“I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one — I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. “Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world.[12]


[1] Wikipedia - Love means never having to say you're sorry

[2] 1 Corinthians 13. My paraphrase with help from

[3] Ephesians 1:4 NIRV

[4] Ephesians 1:4(c), 5 Amplified Version.

[5] Ephesians 1:6 NIRV  See also John17:24

[6] Colossians 1:16 “For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him.”

[7] Revelations 4:11

[8] Acts 17:28

[9] 2 Peter 1:4 NIV.  Read with 2 Corinthians 1:20 “for it is he who is the “Yes” to all of God's promises. This is why through Jesus Christ our “Amen” is said to the glory of God.” Good News Translation.

[10] 2 Peter 1:4

[11] Matthew 11:2 “No one knows the Son except the Father and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.” NIV
See also John 6:44(a) ““No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them,”

[12] John 17:22-24 NIV in particular 23(b) and 24(b) italics mine.

Even as God is Triune love and loving, I perceive complete genuine love and loving displaying three essential and distinct characteristics: the elements of giving, receiving and reciprocating.

Father loves (giving) Son and Spirit. Son and Spirit accept and embraces (receiving) Father’s love (giving). Son and Spirit reciprocate (reciprocating) by similarly loving Father in return. All this happens, in a reciprocal, simultaneous, synergistic, dynamic loving exchange.
 
If God is only ONE, and is love, then complete and eternal love, would ONLY be eternal self-loving. Then, the highest and greatest expression of love would ONLY be loving one’s self, for in eternity there is no genuine and authentic OTHER to love and to be loved in return. There is giving to and receiving from yourself in self- loving. However, there is no reciprocating, as there is no genuine and authentic other reciprocating love to yourself.
 
Jesus’ statements on the first and great commandment[1] and the second like it[2], is instructive on the importance and genuineness of self, the other, love and loving.
 
In the second, Jesus introduced the element of love and loving to one’s relationship to one’s neighbour (the other). More than that, he linked it, as inseparable, of equal importance[3] to the first ; to the love obligation that an Israelite had of loving LORD (YHWH) GOD (Elohim- Plural).[4]
 
In so doing, even as Self and the Other is genuinely real in YHWH ELOHIM, so too, our individual self, and therefore, the self of another, is correspondingly, genuine and real. As such, our love and loving is also authentically and meaningfully real. I believe that this comforts and gives purpose to many who struggle with the notion of whether self or love and loving is authentically meaningful. Even as self and another freely and willingly initiate, create and complete love, giving, receiving and reciprocating love makes self and the other complete, whole and fulfilled.
 
Loving your neighbour as yourself is much more than just doing to others what you wish others will do to you or do not do to others what you do not wish others to do to you. God lives, rests and abides in us when we love our neighbour. It is written in 1 John 4: ”Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”[5] “No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” [6] God is love, and those who abide in love abide in God, and God abides in them.”[7]
 
Giving, receiving and reciprocating love and loving, to and from God and each other, not only enables us to know God and each other, it eventually makes us one in God. Jesus prayed: “I ask not only on behalf of these, but also on behalf of those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one. As you, Father, are in me and I am in you, may they also be in us[8], so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given them, so that they may be one, as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become completely one, so that the world may know that you have sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. Father, I desire that those also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to see my glory, which you have given me because you loved me before the foundation of the world.”[9]


[1] Matthew 22:37, 38

[2] Matthew 22:39

[3] See Matthew 22:34-39.  The word commonly translated ‘and’ is actually Strong’s  G1161 Greek word “ δέ - de” more accurately having the meaning of “but, moreover”. When paired with the Greek words “ὁμοία [(homoia) from homois ( See Strong’s G3664)”] αὐτῇ - literally ‘like it’” , the phrase has within it the connotation of “like but equally important.” “A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’" New Living Translation. “And the second is like it in importance: ‘You must love your friend in the same way you love yourself.’” The Passion Translation. The word “second” connotes distinction and inseparability rather than priority vis a vis the first.  You cannot love God if you do not love thy our neighbour. By loving your neighbour, you are also loving God. See 1 john 4:7,16

[4] Deuteronomy 6:4,5  In Hebrew the word “יְהוָה-YHWH” is translated LORD, and the word “אֱלֹהֶיךָ-Elohim” is translated as God. Note that YHWH is ONE (Deuteronomy 6;4) but Elohim is Plural See Strong’s H430 – plural of אֱלוֹהַּ-‘elowahh meaning God.

[5] 1 John 4:7,8

[6] 1 John 4:12 NRSV See Strong’s G3306 translated as  “lives” here

[7]  1 John 4:16 NRSV   See Strong’s G 3306 translated as “abides’ here.  “God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.” NLT

[8] Other ancient manuscript reads be one in us
​
[9] John 17:20-24 NRSV

Continuing from my last post, what is the quintessential nature and essence of love?

To the apostle John, God is Love.[1] But, what does this mean?
 
For me, this means that in the Being of God, there is a dynamic eternal relationship of love and loving among Father, Son and Spirit. This eternal exchange of giving, receiving and responding in love to One Another is within the true Nature and Essence of Who God is, TRIUNE. God’s ThreeOness, ever in loving relationship, One with Another, is the complete and perfect expression of the nature and essence of love. For me, I believe, this is why God is love.
 
As God, Triune, is love, love also Is, arising from the Triune relationship of God. This means that love exists, because, out of and from the ThreeOne relationship of Father, Son and Spirit.  Love is, only because the Triune relationship is genuinely real. Relationships are real and not illusory imaginings, for, relationships have eternally existed in the eternal Triune Being of God.
 
If God is not Triune but only One, then, only self loving, loving of One’s Self  is eternally with and in God. There is no eternal, real and true love for, with and in Another.  However, if God is more than One and yet also One, TRIUNE, as revealed in, through and by the Incarnate Son and Spirit, then, true, real and eternal loving relationships, not only for one’s self but also another is revealed to be inseparable from, and essentially in, the Nature, Essence and Being of God. For me, this eternal relational happening of union and communion within the Triune, is, presently, the best matrix by which I comprehend and relate to God’s ThreeOneness, in loving nature and being.
 
In union, the Three, Father, Son and Spirit are One. In communion, the ONE GOD, is also Three: Father, Son and Spirit.[2]  Drawing from this, we can perceive that the completeness and perfection of love not only requires love to and for one’s self, but also love towards all others. This arises from the Triune loving relationship, in union and communion, jointly and severally, loving One’s self, loving all the Others as much as loving One’s self and loving and receiving love, simultaneously, in similar manner, from all the Others[3]
 
This Triune completeness and perfection of love and loving is the glory of Triune God in eternity: ““Father, those whom you have given to me—I want that those also may be with me where I am, in order that they may see my glory that you have given me because (in that)[4] you loved me before the foundation of the world(i.e.the universe)[5].”[6]
 
Son’s glory was that of loving union and communion with Father in eternity. Son’s desire was to share this glory with us:  “And I do not ask on behalf of these only, but also on behalf of those who believe in me through their word, that they all may be one, just as you, Father, are in me and I am in you, that they also may be in us, in order that the world may believe that you sent me. And the glory that you have given to me, I have given to them, in order that they may be one, just as we are one— I in them, and you in me, in order that they may be completed in one, so that the world may know that you sent me, and you have loved them just as you have loved me”[7].
 
Son, even in Incarnation, remains ever One with and in Father.[8] To see Incarnate Son is to also see Eternal or Everlasting Father.[9] As Isaiah had prophesied:
“For a child has been born for us;
    a son has been given to us.
And the dominion will be on his shoulder,
    and his name is called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
        Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”[10]
 
Spirit is also, in union and communion, jointly and severally, present with Father and Son, in all. For it is in and through Spirit, in union and communion, with Father and Son, in love, that all, including love and loving, happens.[11] Spirit is the Happening of Triune God, through Whom, Triune God, “I Am that I Am”, lovingly happens.[12]  Spirit expresses God to us and in us.[13]



[1] 1 John 4: 8,16. “Ὁ θεὸς ἀγάπη ἐστίν’”

[2] Please refer to my earlier posts on relationships.  See also the Shema in Deuteronomy 6:4 where "the Lord (YHWH) is ONE and Lord (YHWH) GOD (Elohim-Plural) is more than one.

[3] Loving your neighbor as yourself, an expression of love, seen in this light, reveals  and points us to the completeness of love within the Triune relationship.

[4] For me, should be more accurately translated as ”(in) that” - See Strong’s G3754 ὅτι hóti, hot'-ee; neuter of G3748 as conjunction; demonstrative, that (sometimes redundant); causative, because:—as concerning that, as though, because (that), for (that), how (that), (in) that.

[5] Strong's G2889 – kosmos : 3. the world, i. e. the universe

[6] John 17:24 Lexham English Bible (LEB)

[7] John 17:20-23

[8] John10:30, John17:11

[9] John 14:9-11, Isa 9:6

[10] Isaiah 9:6 LEB

[11] Genesis 1:1-3. John 4:24. 1 Corinthians 12:3-6

[12] Read Luke 1:34-35 in conjunction with John 1:14 and we see Spirit’s role and involvement in making the Incarnation, the Word becoming a human being, a true and genuine reality, lovingly happen.

[13] John 14:17 - Statement in a several context. In Christ Jesus, in the joint, Spirit is not only with us but also in us.